It could be a heated discussion with my kid or a war of words with husband over a trivial matter. It could also be with the maid. The worst situations are those when I have argued over the pettiest matters. My in-laws are really sweet, but getting into argument with elders could feel really bitter. I find myself very cramped, irritated and drained out after the end of the altercation. Especially if I ended up losing my case or raising my voice. I usually have an immediate urge to break down and cry, even howl.
But I have learnt that it doesn’t work, least help. After a bout of weeping, sulking or howling, I come out with a red nose and a worse temper. So today I am going to list out some cheat-sheets that I have tried. They are sure to help you lighten up your mood after an ugly argument.
#1 Do a good deed
No, my #1 is not eating my favorites chocolate or packet of wafers. No comfort food. That leaves me with extra calories which means extra grief. I do a good deed. It could be in the form of packing away unneeded books, toys and other items that I had long intended to give away to the organization that helps children. In the process I also end up de-cluttering their room which I find very therapeutic. If there was an art project that I was planning to start with the kids, I get started on it, in terms of collecting the ideas and items needed.
This almost always immediately wipes out all my negative feeling. But then there is only limited things that are there to give away. So I try one of these below.
# 2 Send out good vibes
That doesn’t mean I pick up the phone and immediately call up my mom or my girlfriends. I tend to overdo the talking with my loved ones. I tend to be biased towards me and blinded towards the opponent’s point of view. So I save that for later. Instead I text couple of my friends, chat with them or tell them something good that I had been meaning to tell for sometime. My caring words make them and me feel terrific.
#3 Sing in the shower, switch on the radio
Ofcourse I switch on the radio. The music, the usual banter of the RJ lightens up the environment. It helps drift my mind away from the grumpiness. A shower always always helps.
#4 Doodle
If I have noone for company because everyone has left either for office or school, I pick up a doodle book and draw or color in vibrant shades. I picked up this habit recently and I must admit that it’s very relaxing. I get some respite as I am not constantly playing the argument again and again in my mind.
#5 Do something new
I am not much into cooking but a part of me wants to be. So I try to cook something new. Homemade ice-cream or made at home muesli. Some DIY decorative boxes for stacking away kids stationary. Gift wrapping techniques, giving a new look to the garden and many more such things.
#6 Talk to a loved one
Once my nerves have calmed down and I am back to my senses, could be even 2-3 hours later, that’s when I talk to a friend, family or neighbor. The usual chitchat eases out the tension further and that’s when if I need an opinion or just let it out, I do so.
#7 Track the good stuff
Once the whirlpool of emotions have subsided, I close my eyes and go over the most relaxing place that I can envision. My last holiday, the day I met my husband, the first time I held my baby. I place myself there fully and the residual tension eases out.
#8 Read a book or visit a bookstore
If I still need to, I go to the neighborhood bookstore, pickup a great book or magazine. Light up an aromatic candle in a cozy corner of my house and immerse myself in the book.
#9 Take a walk
If nothing else works, a walk in the park and whiff of fresh air works for sure. A visit to the shopping mall definately does. Oh yeah. ALWAYS
Auther’s note: Don’t forget to print this and pin it up on your kegboard or kitchen wall.
Image Coutsey : Fitnea
An Urban Nomadic 